Sometimes life throws you an excellent opportunity....
And sometimes you fail to grasp it or even miss it completely, not recognising it for what it is or being too timid to seize the moment, only realising what you have missed when it's too late.
I've had a few moments like that in my career and personal life, as I suppose has everyone else.
Friends will tell you, rightly I suppose, that you shouldn't dwell on them and to get on with your life because another opportunity will be along shortly. But of course, being a fairly normal person (OK, in my opinion fairly normal), in the quiet moments I find it's difficult not to wonder how things might have been, replaying events in my mind, perhaps if only I'd done that or I'd said this, perhaps if he, she had said this I'd have done this and any other number of incalculable different combinations.
Of course you'd have to be odd or a banker (or possibly both) not to dwell on the past but there are advantages to dwelling on things sometimes because you can, in theory, learn from them and not make the same mistake(s) again or learn to recognise things for what they are next time.
There are those who say we make our own luck but they are, in my opinion, deluded. The luck is always there, the skill is in recognising it when it presents itself.
I've recently had one of those moments, I'm not going to go into detail because frankly, apart from realising it was probably my mistake, I haven't yet worked out why things didn't happen the way I'd have liked them to have done. If I'm being really honest, I'm also rather annoyed with myself and not a little embarrassed that I didn't try to steer things in the right direction to make it happen. I'll be kicking myself over that for a while yet...
Today looks like a beautiful day, blue skies and not a cloud in view, the little ones are fuelled and ready to go, I think a picnic is in order.
4 comments:
I've found that as I get older, I don't dwell on the 'what if' or 'maybe' so much - when I was in my twenties, I must confess I was obsessed with them!
And you're right - we don't make our own luck, we merely grab opportunities, even if we do let a couple go by - so grab your bootstraps, and get on with it! :)
Helga, I'm not so bothered any more either, this one was potentially a biggy though, it could have turned into something I've wanted for a while now, hence the kicking myself but as you say, onward and upwards
I used to worry about the whatifs, should I's.. what you've just mentioned. I used to worry about the tiniest of shouldn't even have been a problem, I blow it out of all proportion.. this wears down you inner energy, not good for the soul, but difficult to over come either. But I now say if it takes ya fancy GO 4 it. Life's too short to worry.. but I think as we get older we realise that life aint anything special, it's what we make of life that really counts.. hope this makes sense?
Indi
x
I'm sorry that you're feeling this way - you're right about not living in and rehashing the past (as is Helga), but it's only human to have these thoughts in the aftermath of a disappointment.
I remember reading a fascinating study not so long ago that said that people who think themselves lucky are always optimists and those who think themselves unlucky are pessimists. The theory is that pessimists are so convinced nothing good will happen that they miss the opportunities that optimists, more open to positive possibilities, grasp.
I used to be a pessimist ... now I try very hard to be optimistic. Sometimes, I even succeed!
And may I, in closing, wish you speedy passage to the next bright opportunity. Don't kick yourself too hard - you wouldn't want to be all bruised when opportunity next knocks :-)
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